Popular YouTuber Max Gilardi has said he is considering travelling to Switzerland for assisted dying after years of chronic pain left him struggling to work and facing mounting medical costs. Gilardi, 38, who creates animated videos under the YouTube handle hotdiggedydemon, made the announcement during a livestream on Saturday. He later said he would reconsider the decision following a backlash online.
Gilardi, whose channel has more than 2.1 million subscribers and nearly 500 million views, said his health had deteriorated significantly since being diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2024. The condition causes widespread chronic pain, fatigue and sleep problems, and Gilardi said it had severely limited his ability to produce videos.
“I’m tired all the time. I spend a lot of my time lying down. I get a lot of bad pain in all my joints and my muscles, ankles, shins, hands, knees, hips, neck. I have a lot of difficulty sleeping,” he said during the livestream.
He also described other unexplained symptoms, including episodes of drooling and difficulty speaking, saying doctors had been unable to determine their cause.
“There’s nothing more expensive than living,” he added, referring to the financial burden of ongoing medical treatment.
Explaining why he was considering assisted dying, Gilardi said he had exhausted what he believed were his available options. “After considering every option I could think of, ultimately that solution has taken the form of doctor-assisted euthanasia,” he said.
He described the decision as what felt like a “natural conclusion”. “My existence has become one where I suffer and barely scrape by so I can continue to sustain an existence where I barely scrape by and suffer,” he said.
Gilardi said he planned to travel to Switzerland for the procedure.
Gilardi stated during the livestream that euthanasia is legal in Switzerland.
However, Swiss law distinguishes between euthanasia and assisted suicide. Euthanasia, in which another person directly administers a life-ending intervention, is prohibited. Assisted suicide is permitted under certain legal conditions, with the individual required to carry out the final act themselves.
Following widespread reaction to his announcement, Gilardi said he would pause any immediate plans. In a post on X on Sunday, he wrote: “Decided I’m not thinking clearly, will reassess.”